Pamela and I are at it again! 30PDC – 30 Positive Days Challenge to say something nice to and about your partner every day for 30 days – see details (and rules) HERE and over at Pamela’s Road to Joy site HERE.
In mid-70’s a group called Nazereth had a hit song: Love Hurts:
Love hurts – love scars
Love wounds and mars
Any heart not tough
Or strong enough
To take a lot of pain
Take a lot of pain
Love is like the clouds
Holds a lot of rain
These lovely depressing lyrics were so perfect if one wanted to wallow in depression! Oh my, this song was a heartbreak anthem and I loved it so much – so full of angst and agony which fit where I was when it came out.
And you know what? Those lyrics are absolutely NOT true.
If it hurts, scars, wounds, and mars, it isn’t love. If it has conditions, it isn’t love. If it demands its own way, it isn’t real love. If it says, “If you love me, you will _______ (fill in the blank)” – nope, not love! If it says “I love you but…” it isn’t love because using the word “but” means every word that came before it is erased.
Real love is unconditional and while it should be nurtured and protected, it does not “love with expectations.”
Alpha Hubby excels at unconditional love. He loves me. Period. End of sentence. There is no “I love you because you do this for me” or “I love you ‘cause you are purtier than a speckled pup” or “If you do this, I’ll be your best friend…” err, sorry, that was high school.
So here we are, Days #9-#11 – and I just want the world to know – I love this man. The further we go with this challenge, the more I realize what a treasure I have in Alpha Hubby. I thought I knew that but once I began focusing on all his good points, his goodness, I know more than ever that this is one amazing man.
Day #9 – I love how he takes care of himself, working out, looking sharp. He goes to the gym but also does a lot of physical labor around the ranch which is why Day #10 is that I love his arms – and not just because they are strong and manly man arms (smile). It is why I like my signature avatar so much – a man holding the woman with one arm. The implied strength in this dance move reminds me of Alpha Hubby.
His arms will wrap around me and hold me in a slow dance in the kitchen. Or they will gentle and hold me if I just need a hug. Or as a prelude to *bleepity bleep* which is always good! Always! I can depend on his strength.
Day #11 – I do love how I can trust him to always be the same. Unless he is very, very, very tired – very – Alpha Hubby’s even temperament is almost always the same, smooth and laid back. Oh, there have been some voices-raised discussions about really dumb stuff (and usually my fault for being a terrier who won’t let the bone go), but on the whole, I can count on him to be the calm voice of reason. That is an incredible and amazing “good point” about him.
BUT, on the other hand, if he is short-tempered, then I know he is very, very tired from working too hard (pretty much two full-time jobs sometimes) so that is still the same thing – I know it isn’t personal and that he just needs a break and some sleep.
I’m going to go ahead and do Day #12, too. I love that Alpha Hubby is a man of Honor. With Alpha Hubby, when he spoke his vows, they were forever. He is a man of his word and means what he says. He will not and does not change (which has more to do with God than me which is a very good thing).
His word being good is very important to him, as is his name. His name is synonymous with integrity, and people know that. When he says something, people can trust that word.
There are no hidden or sudden surprises. I don’t really like surprises, or should I say, being caught off guard. With Alpha Hubby, I always know where I stand – firmly in his heart, totally loved.
And that is a wonderful place to live.