As you may know (obviously), I’ve now been married 17 years 8 days. And I’m here to tell you, those 17 years 8 days have been:
Phew. When I think of my life with Alpha Hubby these past years, I can honestly say that there is a place a couple can “live” that makes an ordinary marriage pale in comparison. It is beyond my wildest dreams and imaginings. Most hope for, but few discover, this place we have worked hard to reach. I am a blessed woman. Then again, I waited 12+ years for this Knight so I sure didn’t want to miss out on the fun, romance, hot, hot, hot… that is why we work hard to keep this marriage grounded in what drew us together – true love.
Alpha Hubby is a haven for me. He offered me sanctuary in his arms 17 years 8 days ago and I took it. Nobody did it better. Heck, no one had ever been a sanctuary for me, much less loved me like he does. I’ve never looked back, not one time.
In his love, my heart is I not only safe, protected; I am known and understood in a way no one else on earth has accomplished. He is a total man and makes no apologies that he wants to take care of and protect me and our family. He is very old fashioned and I’m here to tell you – phew, baby! And don’t get on a high horse either ’cause he was drawn (and still is) to my abilities, independence, and strength. In truth, it takes a strong woman to “handle” a strong, tendency-to-dominate man.
There is something special about a man who gives unconditional love. He amazes me with the simplicity of it. He just flat out loves me. One of his favorite lines to me is, “I’m not that deep.” This is usually in answer to some wild hair I’d get thinking he might be thinking I’m thinking he’s thinking something bad about me. You know, one of those “we think too much” thoughts we women can get into sometimes. Those thoughts that lead us to imagine our guy is spending the same amount of time thinking about the same thing – and no, men aren’t really made that way (haha, baby).
I digress. After I quit smoking and got sloppy watching my weight, thinking I’d never gain simply because I didn’t smoke any more – ha! – I began the journey back into my Little Black Dresses. I have about 15 of them in various sizes. I will get into the Size 9 by December (yes it is sparkley!). It is going to take more serious effort than I’ve actually put in since I began this blog – been doing a lot of research, learning and talking, not doing.
One reason I am sticking to this journey and NOT giving up is Alpha Hubby. He is a man beyond what I ever dreamed of meeting and loving. He’s been an amazing support in any endeavor I’ve tackled and believes in me so strongly, I sometimes think he is blinded by bias. He has never made me feel fat (altho I am) but I know deep down in his secret heart, he’d like to have back the woman he married. He’s done that for me, worked at being the best he can be for me.
I am learning to eat to live, not live to eat. Every time I break a sweat (and I HATE to sweat), I do it for him (since I obviously wasn’t going to do it for myself). I found some old pictures of myself at goal weight that I’m keeping before my eyes to remind me where I’m headed. I can do this. I can, I can, I can.
I can’t wait until I can wear a bathing suit again. And I am not going to say the politically correct things people are supposed to say when they give their reasons for losing weight. I am losing weight to make hubby proud of how I look.
When I get on the other side, look out! And yes, I know that I have to be doing this for ME in order for it to really work. But when I do it for him, I am doing it for me, too. Sometimes there is nothing more hot that slammin’ up against the wall… **x (I’m sorry, I had to remove the real word because all of a sudden I was getting all sorts of porn spam). What? You don’t know married people do that? Well we do. It’s not just in the movies, y’all!
It is so much easier if he can lift me, knowwhatImean? No? TMI? Oops, sorry. Then ignore these last few sentences. But if we are going to be honest here, we know excess weight affects that area in so many ways, not just physical (how about FEELING good about yourself half-nekkid?).
We are one and by golly, half of us needs to look and be a little less bulky!
“Cause baby? You ARE the best and nobody does it better… and all that that implies.