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Torturing the Alpha Hubby

Howling Wolf on Tree Stump

I love my Alpha Hubby.  I do.  It is beyond crazy how much I love this man.  God gave him to me on my birthday and that means he can’t ever get away.  He’s bona-fied!!  (Name that movie.)  He’ll have to take it up with God if things get too nutso for him with me. 

Yes, that (picture above)  is what his life is like – always on his knees asking for help because he married me.  Our life is like “The Hippie and The Cowboy”.  When we met, I was far more laid back than he was.  He was not laid back.  At all.  He was a hardnosed workalcoholic force of nature …umm let me see.  He was a VERY serious man. 

He’s got the best (and worst) of the Alpha Man traits.  He’s a MAN with a capital M.  And that is exactly what I needed – although sometimes, it tends to tick me off, anger me to no end test my own patience.  No, I should say “it used to” because I’ve adapted to him & he doesn’t get to me like he used to!  I know he loves me.  I trust him with my life.  He protects my heart in ways I never knew were possible.  And I would like to think I have matured.  *insert hysterical laughter here*  Dream on.

I am a very strong woman.  I took care of myself for a long time and didn’t need no stankin’ man anyone to take care of me.  Like he said, he liked me because, while his personality is such that he might attempt to dominate me, he can’t.  I fight back.  Unfairly to, hoho.   Very, very unfairly.  He is afraid of me.  I think that’s why I get flowers… among other things.  *Ahem* I was talking about support and love.  What?  What did you think I meant?  OK yeah, you caught me – passion.  Even better, romance.

So because of the aforementioned Alpha traits, such as that dominate-you-in-every-area-of-your-life gene, I have to choose my tortures… um fights wisely.   I don’t think Alphas even know they are doing that dominate thing, they just do it automatically.  Sometimes with wonderful results (s*x) and sometimes I want to pinch his leetle head off sit him down and explain the concept of equality, sharing, and blah blah blah (the last is all he will hear). 

So case-in-torture-point:  when we eat popcorn, I tend to spill a few pieces on the carpet.  He constantly points out the popcorn when he sees it, picks it up and puts the pieces in the trash can, muttering all the way.   He doesn’t even give me time to do it at the end of the evening before I leave the living room.  But don’t get the wrong idea – he picks it up because he loves me, not because he’s mean.  It’s just a thing we do. 

I have my ways of getting even, like the other day.  I noticed two teeny tiny pieces of popcorn on the carpet on his side, in front of his chair.  He hadn’t seen them.  I noticed I had about 8 tiny pieces on my side so I picked them all up and put them on his side.  Yeah!  I felt vindicated.  I mean, it wasn’t like he didn’t already have some on his side that he’d missed while nit-picking about the ones on my side, right?  Right!!  Sure, his were hard to see (at least until I got finished putting mine there).   When he saw them all, he was very confused.  Didn’t know how he’d missed them.  I just smiled serenely while inside I was doing a litle boogie dance.

HEY!  An Alpha woman’s gotta do what an Alpha woman’s gotta do. 


 ** Oh OK, yes I told him about the popcorn.  Later that evening.  Heh heh heh.  Ve haff our vays!!

This is a modified version of a previous post from last year!

Our Love Is Here to Stay, Changee

17 thoughts on “Torturing the Alpha Hubby

  1. I’ve noticed most good men seem to LOVE women with lots of spunk and fiery independence. It challenges them intellectually. The meek, submissive types end up with guys that just want someone they can beat down…but we end up with the ones who want to be with someone at their own level.

  2. It is just not right. I must be real slow thinking that you would play fair. What was I thinking? Apparently the wrong thing. I slay dragons and walk the hot sands and brave the blistering cold to get a chance to rescue a fair damsel. Did you see that in the previous contract line: “fair damsel”? You are anything but fair! You cheat, even in board games; in the pool, you lure me into the deep and promise me you won’t dunk me. What do you do? You dunk me! The list goes on with your wily ways of cheating. It is not about love, it is apparently about winning. I will have my chance at victory!

      1. Well, I suppose cheating could be a perception. Scrabble? Using words with more than three letters is cheating or perceived as cheating! Using words I have never heard of is cheating! What about hitting me in the nose? What do you call that? What about in the….? What about the time ….?

  3. Too funny! Mine does similar stuff…..he often asks me if his clothes are in his “other” closet…..meaning the laundry room!

  4. ROFLOL- it’s comical, isn’t it…Nan your life sounds so similiar to mine that sometimes I have a sneaking suspicion of what you’re going to say before I read it.

    Long live the Alpha Males and their Mates…
    (insert dramatic chilling wolf howl for effect HERE)


  5. Easy one….”Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?”….LOL

    We must keep them in line…it’s part of the contract.

    Have a great weekend girlfriend.

  6. Aw the Alpha male .. yes I have one, and couldn’t be happier. He truly was a gift from heaven and I feel very blessed. Much like you and your Mr., it can be a test of strength with us, in a fun loving way.

    I started acquiring tea cups and tea related items shortly after we met and during my early stages of accident recovery. I had enjoyed tea pre-accident ( but more in going for afternoon tea with the girls as an outing, not in my home). So, I was a little confused about my desire to start acquiring these items. But they were the only things that brighten my day and the peacefulness I felt when sipping a cup of tea, was incredible … it took me away from the focus of the post accident life I was facing.

    Fast forward 3 years and our pantry has become – the teaware room… and I love afternoon tea in our home with friends or just on my own. The Mr. even joins me now in than and sometimes when I’m running behind he’ll say “its past 3 pm … are you not making tea today?”

    Wishing you a blessed week-end..xo HHL

  7. Tweet tweet……..tweet-a-leet…… Love birds..

    You little turd…..going to have to remember the popcorn trick and use it on Hunk. I’m still in Colorado visiting my sister so wasn’t the best time to read your romantic stuff with Hunk back in California…. without me. 😉

    Going to go shoot you a long over-due email.

  8. What a cute story! I enjoyed reading about … well everything. I cannot wait to meet my Alpha Male. I’ve been meeting a lot of Gamma Idiots and Beta Fools.

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