(If the music irritates you, just go over to sidebar to song listings and hit pause!)
So 20.6 years ago, I remember during the seven weeks Alpha Hubby and I were dancing around one another… well, it was more like me dancing away and him pursuing like a hunter… I found I was very skittish about the thought of getting married. I wasn’t even doing that well with the semi-dating we were doing. Talk about being a nervous nelly!
I was concerned because based on past experience, I had reason to be concerned. I did not want to let any more axe-murdering psychos into my life again.
I asked him one evening, “So are you going to have a problem if I want to zip down to Louisiana and visit my friends for a weekend? Or meet them somewhere?”
He said, “Well no, I mean why would I? You’re an adult.”
Me: “Well, I’m just concerned. I don’t want to be joined at the hips where we do everything together and lose our individuality. Or one of us can’t go off and do something with friends.” (Here, I believe it is obvious that I’d been single and doing my own thing for 12+ years before meeting Alpha Hubby.)
“Well,” he replied, “I guess I understand that. I’m not going to tell you what you can and can’t do. I might be concerned with you driving long distances by yourself but that’s me, not you. I assume you’ve been doing this a long time on your own.”
Hmph.
So here we are, 20.6 years later and he STILL doesn’t let me forget that conversation. “Haw, haw, Nan,” he snickers, “not wanting to be joined at the hips. Snicker, snicker.” He thinks that it is hysterical now since that is all we are, completely and totally joined at the hips. He knows I meant losing my “self” or “identity” (as I had done in the past) but he likes to rub it in.
Joined at the hips. What does that mean? Well, we go everywhere together. No separate vacations in this household. I don’t want to go anywhere or share adventures with anyone else. Why? Because he’s the most fun I’ve ever had in my life. He is my best friend, truly. He is the only person on this earth who knows ME, inside and out. He knows me like no one has EVER known me, not even my mother.
We can go on a road trip and talk all the way there and back. It is like we never run out of things to talk about, ever. Oh I’m sure some of our conversations are totally ridiculous to other people, but who cares? We have fun and “we” are all that matters.
I know he would protect me with his life. He’s proven it I know he loves me unconditionally. He’s proven it. It is the most amazing thing, to be loved this way. Then again, te’s a pretty amazing man.
And I have to say, I really love being joined at the hips with him.
Except.
There are times I crawl into bed and, although we have a king-sized bed, I am only able to get on the very edge of the bed. Somehow he is asleep in the middle or occasionally takes up an additional 1/4 of my side with his sprawled body on it. This triggers the gentle (ha!) slight… shall we say… shoving to get him to roll over and eventually begin to make his way to his side of the bed. THAT joined at the hips is not for me. I don’t like falling out of bed.
And the other day in the kitchen where we have a tall double seater bench we sit on at the counter, I realized I had one butt cheek hanging off my side of the bench. Every time he put the fork to his mouth, he elbowed me. So I elbowed him back and said, “Get your butt off my side of the bench!” He was actually in the middle but the middle is on both sides. Again, NOT a joined at the hips I enjoy, especially with an elbow in my face! I don’t like falling off the bench.
But, after long belly button contemplation, I came to the conclusion that if I have to put up with his space-hogging-thieving ways to have the rest of the man he is, I guess I am going to be joined at the hips and battling space thieving another 60 years or so. Loving it.
Aww you guys are the cutest! Such a marriage inspiration, too! Me and the hubs pretty much do everything together too…although lots of people believe in that whole “opposites attract” thing, I think it really helps when you and your significant other truly enjoy a lot of the same activities, that way they can be done together!:-)
There are a lot of things we are total opposites about but our core beliefs are the same. He was country and cows and I… was NOT. We’ve grown into one another because if you’d told me I’d own a pair of Muck boots, I’d have laughed you out of town!
First of all I never got my email notification that this post had gone up, Nan!! Secondly, you modified my Heart Space Invaders over to the right! Ohhhh…you thought you could sneak them by me but…no!! Clicking, clicking, clicking, clicking. Ahhhh…much better. Wow, I hadn’t done that in a long time….was it good for you too? I absolutely LOVED this post my dear sweet friend!!! “Joined at the hips. What does that mean?….” that entire paragraph totally made me cry. And I’m at work! That was Phoenix to T, Nan. Hugs xoxo 🙂
I think I solved the notification part. You are so funny with the heart destroying! And yep, Phoenix was your hip joiner.
Glad you found someone worth being joined at the hips over…even if it’s not ideal in EVERY situations! 😉
Yes, I am one blessed woman.
Dearest Nan I don’t know why I haven’t been seeing you in my blog feed!!! I have been missing out on so much inspiration…Have just been reading and catching up here… Love the blog layout!! Wishing you and Alpha hubby and family a blessed Thanksgiving … hugs, C.
Feed hopefully fixed. Thanks for stopping by anyway, dear friend!
Eric told me about this post. It made me smile. We are out in our 28 foot trailer in Nowheresville for a week, trampling all over each other, and we had just talked about how wonderful it is that this doesn’t REALLY bother us, and that we are happily here with no desire to see or talk to other humans, because being joined at the hips has turned out to be a really wonderful thing, like you guys!
I know, right? We smooshed together on our vacation and it was OK ’cause I love him. He really is my best friend and most fun ever.
Although I do go on trips with friends/sisters on rare occasions, The Superhero is my very best friend in the world and understands me……he often tells me how I feel before I’ve expressed the feeling. I feel so sorry for people who don’t have this kind of relationship (and I know what that is having NOT had it in my first marriage)…..even my sister who has been married 47 years to a great guy and brother to me…..will say “you got the best husband”…..:) Thank you Lord!
I so agree with you – thank God! I’m sorry others don’t experience what we have. But then again, ot all goes back to that pesky word – WORK.
I love this post. Really. It is so much like Pamela and I as well and makes me smile as I think about it. Well done.
Thank you for stopping by. I love that you and Pamela have such an amazing relationship.
Space is on the three minute rule. If it is not occupied within that three minutes then it is free area.
Grrrrr. You have taken that 3-minute rule and pushed it into places it shouldn’t go!