All Blogs, Romance

Smokin Hot

The other day I was thinking about smoking hot sex.  Why, you ask?  Well – if you have to ask….

Just kidding.

Here’s da thang – Alpha Hubby and I have been married almost 17 years (shy 38 days) and our sex life is more smoking hot than ever.  Oh quit acting like I’m talking like a porno queen.  Married couples have smoking hot sex lives.  I know single people want to believe that the only way to have smoking hot sex is as a single person but that just ain’t so, Joe!!  I have a news flash for you – according to ALL the research I’ve read, married people have hotter sex and more of it.  Committed sex is far better.

 

So why am I talking about it?  Well, I’m not, really.  What I want to talk about is WHY we have smoking hot sex.  Oh stop that – I’m not talking private details.  I’m talking about remembering how it felt when you first dated and what was so wonderful about him – what made you run to answer the phone call from him.   And no, it wasn’t asthma; he really did make it hard to catch your breath because you were so infatuated with him!  I’m talking respect, honor and zipped lips. 

When I was single, I remember being at work during lunch breaks.  I used to listen to the married women talk about their husbands.  The things they said should have been left unsaid because they were private things.  They’d get off on things like what babies they were when they were sick.  I don’t think they realize how “I am so superior” they sound and it isn’t attractive (or true).

 

For some reason, women believe that when they get together with their girlfriends or female co-workers, it’s perfectly OK to bash their husbands or boyfriends.  It’s this “us women” against “them” thing and I, for one, HATE IT WITH A PASSION.  No woman is more important to me than my husband.

I’ve learned a really good lesson listening to these women.  It is not OK to bash, disrespect or otherwise ‘dis our man when we are with our girlfriends.  When we bash the man in our life, we cut off the smoking hot sex life cause you can’t have smoking hot sex with someone we disrespect.  Gossip vs. smoking hot sex, gossip vs. smoking hot sex.  No contest, baby!  It’s the smoking hot sex life I‘m sticking with!

Alpha Huby and I married at 40 so I didn’t want to end up with a boring marriage after waiting for him for so long (12+ years)!  During our first few months of marriage, we had many conversations about romance, passion and smoking hot sex.

We made a promise to one another that we would never fall into the bad habit of being roommates and we’d keep the honeymoon going for all our lives.  I know in the thrall of newlywed bliss most married couples think they will do this – but few actually do.  It takes work and most people get lazy about protecting their marriages.

Alpha Hubby and I had to learn the ways to keep the focus on one another and not everyone else or everything else.  We honor and respect one another.  I can tell you that in almost 17 years of marriage – 5,894 days – I have not one time spoken badly of Alpha Hubby to another person on this earth, ever.  I have never exposed what may be considered weaknesses.  He has done the same thing for me. 

He’s too valuable and precious to me as I am to him – and I want to keep it that way.

And… the smoking hot sex ain’t so bad, either!!!  I swear!*

*I Swear, song sung by John Michael Montgomery

34 thoughts on “Smokin Hot

  1. ~~OMG. I looooove you, NAN!

    You have inspired me to go have some hot sex with my Brit Hubby…

    Your blogs have been a great distraction from my mourning…

    How is the Alpha Hubbing doin’????

    Thank you. You are my kinda gal.
    xx

  2. ~~OMG. I looooove you, NAN!

    You have inspired me to go have some hot sex with my Brit Hubby…

    Your blogs have been a great distraction from my mourning…

    How is the Alpha Hubbing doin’????

    Thank you. You are my kinda gal.
    xx

  3. This was a great post! I never really thought about this topic in this regard. You are so RIGHT!! I am going to start having smokin hot sex too! YAY! I am getting ready to celebrate my 10 year anniversary

  4. This was a great post! I never really thought about this topic in this regard. You are so RIGHT!! I am going to start having smokin hot sex too! YAY! I am getting ready to celebrate my 10 year anniversary

  5. I couldn’t agree with this post more! I remember overhearing a conversation where one woman was complaining that her husband was sick-coughing repeatedly and what not and she made him go sleep on the couch because, “One of us deserves some sleep!” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing!

    I’m not a perfect wife by any means but I hope I always hold my husband as precious.

  6. I couldn’t agree with this post more! I remember overhearing a conversation where one woman was complaining that her husband was sick-coughing repeatedly and what not and she made him go sleep on the couch because, “One of us deserves some sleep!” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing!

    I’m not a perfect wife by any means but I hope I always hold my husband as precious.

  7. Really loved this post. Husband bashing is NEVER a good idea, and I agree with you….. a sex in a committed relationship is such a beautiful thing….:)

  8. Really loved this post. Husband bashing is NEVER a good idea, and I agree with you….. a sex in a committed relationship is such a beautiful thing….:)

  9. You know, people don’t talk like this anymore, at least not often. Great post! I’ve been in groups of women who have marriages that are faded and they complain a lot and not only put down their husbands, but marriage as well. I’m newly married and committed and madly in love with my husband, but it’s oh so nice to hear that it can be done and marriage actually can get better, not worse, like I hear so often. Thank you!

  10. You know, people don’t talk like this anymore, at least not often. Great post! I’ve been in groups of women who have marriages that are faded and they complain a lot and not only put down their husbands, but marriage as well. I’m newly married and committed and madly in love with my husband, but it’s oh so nice to hear that it can be done and marriage actually can get better, not worse, like I hear so often. Thank you!

  11. thanks for stopping by today I am so glad you did I love this post and how much you love your hubby and I totally agree with what you said I didnt marry my soul mate till I was in my 40’s and we have smokin hott sex is there any other with the man of your dreams??? I could have never said that with my first but we where not meant to be thanks for reminding me why I love my man and why we have smokin hott sex..

  12. thanks for stopping by today I am so glad you did I love this post and how much you love your hubby and I totally agree with what you said I didnt marry my soul mate till I was in my 40’s and we have smokin hott sex is there any other with the man of your dreams??? I could have never said that with my first but we where not meant to be thanks for reminding me why I love my man and why we have smokin hott sex..

  13. You go girl! I believe in this 1000% percent. Your post made me stop and think. Have I ever dissed Eric to anyone? I honestly don’t believe I ever have. Does this mean he is perfect? If he is not, it’s my little secret. Now, I tease him unmercifully, and he takes my blog with a grimace and a smile — he feels loved when I write about him, but he’d prefer that it wasn’t about his underwear, ya know? But I don’t tell nothing else, baby, because I don’t ever want him to feel he is not a man (like I want him to see me as a woman) in his eyes, and like it or not, respect is the basis for that pedestal we want to be on.

    Smokin hot sex requires TRUST. Can you really trust someone who badmouths you to their girlfriends? And if you are badmouthing your husband, are you lying to your friends, or do you really believe that your husband is a jerk? If you think he’s a jerk, how can you want him? We see what we are looking for. What we focus on, what we speak about, is what we see. If you say he is a jerk, he is to you. And he knows it. And you’re gonna lose not only the smokin hot sex, but, someday, the man.

    I swear. 😉

    And I ain’t losing mine. Because he rocks. And, yes, the sex is unbelievable. Not because of some special amazing moves either of us have. But because I AGREE WITH NAN (and leland).

  14. You go girl! I believe in this 1000% percent. Your post made me stop and think. Have I ever dissed Eric to anyone? I honestly don’t believe I ever have. Does this mean he is perfect? If he is not, it’s my little secret. Now, I tease him unmercifully, and he takes my blog with a grimace and a smile — he feels loved when I write about him, but he’d prefer that it wasn’t about his underwear, ya know? But I don’t tell nothing else, baby, because I don’t ever want him to feel he is not a man (like I want him to see me as a woman) in his eyes, and like it or not, respect is the basis for that pedestal we want to be on.

    Smokin hot sex requires TRUST. Can you really trust someone who badmouths you to their girlfriends? And if you are badmouthing your husband, are you lying to your friends, or do you really believe that your husband is a jerk? If you think he’s a jerk, how can you want him? We see what we are looking for. What we focus on, what we speak about, is what we see. If you say he is a jerk, he is to you. And he knows it. And you’re gonna lose not only the smokin hot sex, but, someday, the man.

    I swear. 😉

    And I ain’t losing mine. Because he rocks. And, yes, the sex is unbelievable. Not because of some special amazing moves either of us have. But because I AGREE WITH NAN (and leland).

  15. You can’t have smokin hot sex with someone who thinks you are a bozo. You can have sex but not smokin hot because you have to be into the other person.

  16. You can’t have smokin hot sex with someone who thinks you are a bozo. You can have sex but not smokin hot because you have to be into the other person.

  17. Great post Miss Nan! It does take work for sure, but well worth it. And you hit the nail on the head about women talkin’ smack on their hubbies…… I grew up with it actually and had to UN-learn it.

    No smack talkin’ on my hubby…… He doesn’t deserve it and he doesn’t do it to me…..Lord knows he could say as much as I could….if not more. =)

    Will be 23 years for us….not all smokin’ hot……but he’s still hot! Thanks for the reminder to get the smokin’ hot back in the bedroom….. Easy to find reasons (excuses) to NOT work on that.

    Love ya Nan(ers)

  18. Great post Miss Nan! It does take work for sure, but well worth it. And you hit the nail on the head about women talkin’ smack on their hubbies…… I grew up with it actually and had to UN-learn it.

    No smack talkin’ on my hubby…… He doesn’t deserve it and he doesn’t do it to me…..Lord knows he could say as much as I could….if not more. =)

    Will be 23 years for us….not all smokin’ hot……but he’s still hot! Thanks for the reminder to get the smokin’ hot back in the bedroom….. Easy to find reasons (excuses) to NOT work on that.

    Love ya Nan(ers)

  19. Oh my sweet Nan. I love so many things about you, but this one in particular….your loyalty and your love for your husband…..warms my heart. I have never understood women who dis their men (or partners) to others. This is disrespectful of this most important person in your life. Thanks for being unique in that you do just the opposite and with such class, my dear! What a lovely lady you are, and I’m so happy that you are having smoking hot sex!
    Hugs,
    Terri
    😛

  20. Oh my sweet Nan. I love so many things about you, but this one in particular….your loyalty and your love for your husband…..warms my heart. I have never understood women who dis their men (or partners) to others. This is disrespectful of this most important person in your life. Thanks for being unique in that you do just the opposite and with such class, my dear! What a lovely lady you are, and I’m so happy that you are having smoking hot sex!
    Hugs,
    Terri
    😛

  21. Well said… And O SO True… Respect is the base. Gossip is always deadly, no matter where it is applied. Between spouses or parents and kids, friends. No one wins with gossip! Very good post!

  22. Well said… And O SO True… Respect is the base. Gossip is always deadly, no matter where it is applied. Between spouses or parents and kids, friends. No one wins with gossip! Very good post!

  23. I don’t know how I found your site but I’ve spent a lot of time today reading your older posts along with this incredible one. I agree with you. Many people destroy their marriages because they don’t protect one another. It is so simple and while not easy to do, it is so worth it. I really, really like how you say what should be said and say it so bluntly! Yet make me like it. Smile!

  24. I don’t know how I found your site but I’ve spent a lot of time today reading your older posts along with this incredible one. I agree with you. Many people destroy their marriages because they don’t protect one another. It is so simple and while not easy to do, it is so worth it. I really, really like how you say what should be said and say it so bluntly! Yet make me like it. Smile!

  25. Oh my gosh Nan. You keep upping the bar and challenging us to make good marriages. I love how you write. You just throw it all out there for us to leave or take, but never forget!

  26. Oh my gosh Nan. You keep upping the bar and challenging us to make good marriages. I love how you write. You just throw it all out there for us to leave or take, but never forget!

Comments are closed.