Let’s Get It On

September 23rd, 2015

I entitled this post “Let’s Get It On” because the first song playing was Marvin Gaye’s version; apparently Hypster has removed all his versions of the song so it’s gone. Now it starts with Norah Jone’s “Turn Me On”, for inquiring minds.

couple gazing

I read an article about “love after **” (** being a certain age). I kind of felt sorry for the author because he thinks ** is old and ACTS and TALKS like it. Because of that, his advice was a joke to me. I mean, we’re of the generation who had this song you’re listening to by Marvin Gaye, not to mention his song, Sexual Healing. We had or heard the coolest songs
that are still popular to this day. Right or wrong, we burned bras and we protested. We drove MUSCLE cars, baby!

We were so cool, the cool people called us cool.

So why? Why would these amazing people compromise themselves by… **hack fur ball** …getting old? Allowing oneself to quit being cool?? I mean, one thing I’ve learned, if you act old, you are old no matter what age you are.  We also live in a wonderful time where science is discovering more things that slow down the aging process.

The reason I don’t define ** is because old is really a state of mind and I’ve met 30+ year old people who are OLD and 70+ year old people who are young in actions and heart.  Like I’ve pointed out many times on this blog, age is just a number.

From Here to Eternity

From Here to Eternity

But I digress. I was talking about “love after **” and when I say “love” I don’t mean the mushy feeling. I mean the word I can’t write because then I get spammed to death on my blog, s*x. Yes, I said it – S*X! S*X after **, which is kind of a joke because I know most 20 year old people are not doing that, much less most ** year old people.

When Alpha Hubby and I first married, about a week before he went on night shift, we would spend the evenings over a glass of wine, talking. Remember, we met then married 7 weeks later so we didn’t know one another THAT well.

We talked about how vital it was to protect our relationship. I’d been single (and abstinent) for 12 years. I wasn’t about to settle and miss out on the cool stuff after doing without for 12 loooong years. I’m talking the dating, the movies, the dancing, the romancing, and yes, the s*x.

We talked about not losing the “honeymoon” feeling for one another. We talked about the importance of making sure we always had time for one another.  We talked about what made one another feel secure and loved in this relationship.

I’d shared about an article stating what women needed to feel secure, one being financial stability. And saying: instead of “*burp* great meal, hon!” women would like to hear “I love you (and this is why…)”.

He told me of a little known secret, to most women, about men. He said, “You know what most men need for security? To feel loved? Well, maybe not all men, but me, for one? S*x. There is something about that that says ‘home’ to me. You are my home, Nan, and that act says you want me, love me, need me, and appreciate me.”

Huh.

Now, lest you think he was just soliciting for more s*x (which he does, all the time, but wasn’t the point back then), since that discussion, I’ve read more men’s articles and posts about the exact same thing. Most men equate s*x with love & security, and thus, when they don’t get that it affects the relationship. They’re not feeling loved. 

I know back then, if we went without, a slow distancing began happening, that dreaded “roommate disease” that happens to so many couples. We caught on and made a promise not to allow many days to go by without getting in touch, literally. We aim for every day, then if we hit 3-5 times a week, we’re good. Intimacy is so vital to a healthy relationship.

Couple beach seduction

Older Couple

So back to the point of this article – “love after **” – you can make it as boring or as hot as you like, hotter. The benefit of knowing one another for so long is that you know each other and know what makes it hawt. Really, really hawt. All over the house and outside hawt. What? You don’t think people after the age of ** can do that? Boy, what rock are you living under?

So, the point – this past week, I’ve had the cold from H E double hockey sticks. I don’t remember the last time I had something hit like this – stopped up to the point I can’t hear, breath, talk, sleep, blah blah blahdy blah. Many days worth.

Monday, I figured up on my fingers how long since we connected and said, “Meet me in the pool, baby” except it sounded more like “Mead be in da pood, baba” but he understood. He’s smart like that.

Other than Monday, it has been over a week and that is unacceptable. Thus today’s intro song for Alpha Hubby.

lights pool

Night Swimming

Baby – LET’S GET IT ON. No more waiting, wasting time, or allowing too much more time to pass by.  

“Mead be in da pood, baba! I’bb be waiding.”

.

16 Responses to “Let’s Get It On”

  1. You beautiful, amazing woman! I love how you mentor!

  2. Karena says:

    Nan, You are so smart and so right about men. I cannot imagine being in a relationship without true intimacy and connection!!

    xoxo
    Karena
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    Artist Lee Bowers
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    • LBDDiaries says:

      Ehhh, it’s not me! I was smart enough to do one thing: pick Alpha Hubby’s brain. I wanted us to have THE very best marriage and relationship and, of course, he agreed!

  3. Gary Sidley says:

    Three to five times per week? Crikey, I can’t compete with that. The frequency of rumpy-pumpeyin my case is rather less frequent these days – although the quality is better!

    • LBDDiaries says:

      We just made it a major big deal because we both know how easy it is to become “roommates” – it is so easy to let it slide in our life, so we work very hard not to! It may not always be candlelight and roses (rarely); sometimes it is just … you know, a quickie!!

  4. The best way to make our adult sons squirm is to hint that their father and I might still be having s****x. I get it. I’m **, and I know I wasn’t immaculately conceived, but I’d still rather not think about how I came to be. 😉 I think most men and most women have different associations about s**x, but IMHO, if it’s connected to emotional intimacy—it’s all good.
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    • LBDDiaries says:

      Our son freaks out if we kiss passionately (Eww, mom, get a room). Love that! Someday he’ll understand. And thinking about my parents isn’t hard because they were ALWAYS kissing, hugging, dancing, or dad would swing her down in a dip. And yeah, “Eww, get a room parents!”

  5. You’re an amazing woman and inspire me, Nan! Hope you had da bbast time in da pood! 😉

  6. Merz says:

    There is so much about this post that I do so love. Muscle cars, hack fur ball, and oh yes yes yes to burp thanks for dinner honey. This post is so very true and so very funny. I really am so glad to know there is life after ** whatever ** may be, right? You always do me good.

    • LBDDiaries says:

      I know! I’m just glad we are living in a time when science helps us to not get old but to live a wonderful life!

  7. Keep well, darling Nan.
    life and sex after ….????
    Do tell!

    • LBDDiaries says:

      Hmm, if I tell the **… part then I’d have to hunt you down and take you out (smile)! Besides Alpha Hubby thinks I already tell a wee bit too much (ho) about our s*x life – not that he really cares. He’s just glad he has a really great one!!

  8. As always great topic! and well written. Hope you are feeling better my friend. Blessings, Celia M.
    Celia M. High Heeled Life recently posted…Time for a Fresh Start …My Profile

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